Barefoot and Crazy.....for GOD!

Most people wake up on Sunday thinking it is just another Sunday. Me, Sundays set my mood, pace, and emotion for the week. With Monday just around the corner, I think "am I going to have a good week?" "Am I going to struggle?" "Am I going to do something life-changing?" This Sunday, WOW!!
To start off, my WHOLE family went to Church, Lance comes sometimes but not all the time. I was soooo over joyed to have my WHOLE family sitting with me. I felt like getting all dressed up, putting my new white heels on for the first time, and fixing my hair.
We walk into to church and our favorite speaker is leading the Worship Band, Scot Longyear. What an awesome guy. The lesson: "How can we say that will will DIE for GOD, yet we can't LIVE for HIM?" Keith Meece did an amazing job, I can't even begin to explain things. He begins telling us about this Foundation called Soles 4 Souls. Then went on saying that we needed to stand up and LIVE FOR HIM. Billions of people lost everything they had in the hurricanes and Tsuami's (sp?) and it was time for us to stand up. He dared us to give God the shoes on our feet. Wow! He wanted us to walk out of church on this rainy muddy day with no shoes on our feet. Lesson being people everyday walk without shoes that lead to infections, sickness, and eventually to death. People DIE because they don't have shoes to walk in. So we gave our shoes to them. I wish I could give you a picture of all the shoes that covered the stage and the barefoot people leaving church. The thoughts going through my head were.. "God knew when I put this NEW shoes on my feet this morning, that He KNEW where they would end up." BUT there was no question in my mind about what I was about to do. I took my shoes off and with a smile laid them on the stage. I came back and watch people bring there shoes and give them away. My heart was happy. I remember Haiti. I remember the children, adults and the NEED for love and God. My brother(lance) has one pair of tennis shoes, (he wears his work boots all the time) He loved these shoes. Lance's relationship with God is growing. At the end of the sermon he kicked his shoes off and said "sis, take those up there" It makes me cry even more now. I'm so blessed!

I've had a tough week with the devil trying to take over my mind! The devil trying to tear apart my family. The devil tempting us. Struggles. Lies. Secrets. Gossip. These things aren't good for the soul. So, today I gave it all to Him. He is my strength!
I just wanted to share my Sunday with you!
Keep Looking up!

Haiti Mission Trip June 2009 "Forever Changed"

A month and a half later and I finally post about the trip that changed me into a person that I never thought I would be. So I hope you enjoy reading about my journey.
Wow! What can I say. I can't wait to go back. I don't know when that will be but I know if God leads me back I'll be there!
Eph 5:2 and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us...and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.
Most of you know how much I love children. They are such a blessing. Many days while on this adventure children just want to be held, hugged or loved on. They want your attention all the time! John Mchoul the missionary that is part of Heartline ministries told us that a single adoption can take up to two years. I could not imagine. One of my lifetime goals is to adopt always has been but this trip made it even more clear. I have an adoption that took place in my family 7 years ago and I can't imagine waiting two years for that child. No matter how long the wait it would be totally worth it.
What I learned:
God is patient. I feel like this trip was just yesterday. Sleeping in hot hot weather. (or lack of sleepin) This is an insert from my journal while I was there.
"Saturday day 6
Today I am in a rut. I think it really hit me that I'm ready to go home. I don't like being smelly and dirty ALL the time. But then I think why am I complaining. My goal is to help others. I sit here and write how hot and sticky I am but I have to remember WHY I'm here. Look for the POSITIVE."

As I read over that today, I realize that this mission was not easy for me. I struggled. But in the end I came out a better person! I remember the day we took food to the slums. We started with a nice smooth line,by the end of the adventure things were getting out of hand. People are starving and would do about anything to get food. At one point I remember thinking Am I going to make it out of this one exit upstairs room? Kids were on the roof throwing rocks at us, men and women were at the doors yelling and wanting in. I thought "this is something that could give me nightmares." Needless to say, God was with us then just as He is now.

These was taking the same day, I had paint all over me.

I have several pictures that I could post. But my computer is messing up. (of Course) I have all of them up on facebook if you would like to see more.
This trip was AMAZING to say the least. Every part of it. Even when God was challenging me. "even in my darkest hour" I was ready to be home, but when I did return home my mind wanted to know what people in Haiti were doing. I wanted to be holding babies or painting there fingernails(which we did one day). I did not mention that we did a VBS for the children at the orphanage as the nannies went to different classes. Classes such as, Self defense, First aid, Nutrition, and Ideas for playing. The Nannies really enjoyed these classes and received certificates at the end of the week. Some of the things we did in VBS was painting washcloths, tying balloons around flip flops, Tye-die?, coloring, and when other things.
One day we worked on making care bags for those expecting mothers who had nothing. These bags included, diapers, clothes, pads, anything that they might have needed to start with. Remembering they had nothing.

I am truly blessed to have the life that I do. I realize that life is not easy over there and if I can help out in some little way I'll do it! I'm so thankful that I got the chance to go. I'll do it again.

P.S. I AM working on thank u cards/letters. So if you supported me financially don't worry I haven't forgot about you.
Those you just prayed for me and my team THANK YOU! I know this trip would not have made as much of an impact if it wasn't for your prays, Thank you so much!

Keep looking up
have a great week!

Blah...

It's the only word I can use to describe myself. I've had a rough week. I haven't had much sleep this week. Lets back up. My last post I mentioned how my brother lost a dear friend. Tuesday I watched my brother as they laid his best friend in the ground. I watched his blank stare and you could see the hurt. People continue to ask how my Lance is doing. I only hope he's turning to God for his needs.

Next, I worked Tuesday night, Wednesday, and Thursday. Trying to keep myself busy. Then the next couple of nights I haven't been able to sleep without irruptions. Friday night it stormed and the blew was blowing. I had parked my car under our basketball goal and I kept thinking that the goal was going to fall on my car because the goal has been known to do that. So I got out of bed at 4 something in the morning and moved my car, along with rolling up the truck windows in the rain. Saturday, I was woke up around 4:45 am with a call from someone dear that just needed some help. She's family so I didn't think twice about answering. I couldn't go back to sleep. Then came last night, Sunday.

11:30pm I had just fell asleep and the phone rang, I felt like it was a lot later than it was. My heart sunk. I had to answer it. It's my Grandma Miller. She needed my dad. I knew in her voice something wasn't right. It's my grandpa. His heart was skipping beats and he knew something wasn't right. The thoughts running through my head were insane. My dad left in such a hurry.

.....I crawled in my bed and covered up and just prayed. I couldn't lose him not yet. My body was shaking. I replayed everything that had happened that day. We went to Providence with them that day, we had them over for lunch that day, and we laid around and watched the race. But I couldn't recall tell them that I loved them or even see you later. That's not like me. SO, I was pleaded with God, to give me another chance.

....My mom came in and laid down and put her arms around me. I told her I was so scared. She's knows my relationship with my grandpa is one of a kind. I'm the only granddaughter and he makes it known and loves me soo much that I've never doubted it. I know it's silly but I'm always praying that he out lives me. Last night I thought I was losing him. Then I felt a sense of peace. I didn't know to trust that feeling or not. My mom came in at almost 3am telling me that they had things under control and he was going be okay. I then could close my eyes, Thank God, and fall asleep.

Today I've struggled. I don't know if it's because I'm just exhausted or what. I just haven't been myself.

Sorry that this is long, I just needed to get this off my chest. Thanks for listening if you got through all of this.

Keep looking up and I'll do the same

Hope you have a good week!

Christmas 07

Senior Prom

I love you Papaw! I hope to spend many more years with you! :)

God gives and He takes away..

My brother just lost a good friend today. Please pray for their comfort through this difficult time. Sometimes we don't understand why God does the things He does, but He always has a reason. God has bigger plans for Dustin.
Abby's blog has this written:

"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those love HIM"

No one is guaranteed tomorrow, we must serve him every single day....

How true is that?

I don't know what to do. Should I cry or scream? No matter what I do it won't lessen the hurt and the pain that many people are going through right now!
So love on your family don't take one moment for granted.

New Challenge

I'm sorry I haven't updated about my trip to Haiti, but I can't get pictures to upload and I don't want to post till I can.

Lately I've been feeling like I'm ready to extend my faith and passion for Christ. Even going to Haiti changed how I view things and made me grow. I'm ready for my next challenge. In church on Sunday, something struck me. I don't remember the exact words that were said but something like this "you will always make time for something you love or that you think is important"

WOW!

Our pastor was saying how we don't read God's word like we should. Yet, that's the book with all the answers we need to any question. We say God's so important to us, but yet we don't make time for Him. So he's challenging us as a church to a reading plan. I started reading tonight. I know I'll struggle but I'm willing to try. Are you? I'm asking anyone that's up for the challenge to work with me! I'm excited!

I started the first day: Ezra 7 & 8

If you are willing to do this with me, read these two chapters, doesn't take long, share with me what things stood out to you, and I'll share what stood out to me!

What stood out to me the most, is how God always has his protective hand over us. He protects those who acknowledge Him. In my personal life I worry too much, most of you know this. Sometimes I have to sit back and think "why I'm I worried?" don't I trust Him? I do, and I'm working on this battle.

This post will be up till I get back from my trip on July 14th. So invite many, and if I slack on getting new reading plans let me know! I'll try and post as often as I can! I'm not good with updating but the more people I have interested the easier it is for me to update. If you want to suggest a certain book or chapter of the Bible to read let me know. But I'm really excited about this! I don't know how long this will go but I hope me and whoever learn and move closer to Him.

Have a good rest of the week!

Keep looking up!

Close your eyes & Anticipate

I'm just going to spill wants on my heart and in my head everyday. I don't want you to think I'm a drag, I still have my own struggles.
I couple of weeks ago at PS/CC(work), some kids were picking/talking about how Ethan B. doesn't have a mom. Ethan was quick to say "YES I DO, SHE'S IN HEAVEN." He went on telling these children that if you close your eyes really tight you can see her. Good thing I had sunglasses on because the tears just came. This little boy melts my heart. Sometimes the children don't understand exactly whats going on but we try and make him feel comfortable. One day Ms. Nikki was talking to the children about the thunder and lightening. She was explaining that they shouldn't be scared because lightening was just angels taking pictures and thunder was just angels bowling. Ethan says, "I bet my mom is bowling a strike." Anticipate. I'm always anticipating what God has in store for me next. I know that sometimes I get upset at this job BUT I know I was put their for a reason. God was with us Friday when we raised over $300 for Team Andrea(Relay for Life) just by doing a simple Lemonade stand. The kids loved it and I enjoyed being with them and raising money for such a great cause. All of it was going to cancer research! God is truly amazing!!
My family was here this past week. I miss them dearly. Parker is getting ready to have his hip surgery on June 5. I'm scared to death. I can't be there. I can't know enough information fast enough and I'm worrying TOO much. I want this to be perfect and for him to do well. I have to tell myself over and over again that God won't give me more than I can handle!
My Haiti mission trip is two weeks away. I'm stressed that I'm not mentally and emotionally ready for this trip. I'm excited with how God is working in my life. I continue to pray that He is with me and guides me through this trip.
Marriage?... One of my best friends in high school got married this weekend. I knew it was coming just didn't know when. I'm shocked because I didn't think it would effect me the way it does. I remember going to her sisters wedding and I just can't believe I didn't even know where or when she was getting married. I know we haven't talked in years and I don't even know why we don't talk but I guess I'm hurt. I never really thought my life would turn out like this. I've lost some good friends over the years and reasons that I'll never know. But I hope they have a wonderful life and I wish them well.
Maybe God is pushing me towards certain people that I have yet to meet. I will agree that I've had many struggles this past year and I'm not sure how to cope or deal with them. But I'm still anticipating what God has in store for me. Just please keep me in your prayers along with those who have the same struggles. I know God has a bigger plan I just don't know what it is yet. Sometimes it's as easy as closing your eyes and picturing what's coming next!
Have a good night!

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday Bubby!

My little brother is an ADULT! 18! WOW!

I love him so much and I know it will be hard when he moves to Indy this fall, but he promises me he will move back home. He is going to Lincoln Tech for a year. He's birthday was May 3 and he was in New York/Washington D.C....Cool huh? well he caught a cold and said he felt horrible.

Happy Birthday Amber!

Yep, they are only 3 days apart. Amber turned 18 on May 6.

She is such a beautiful girl. I am so glad that she has my brother. Many times she confides in me, high school isn't fun for her. Girls can be so mean and make it awful for her to go to school. BUT she is a strong girl. She is at the top of her class and got a full ride to VU for PTA.

She reminds me of a song that I've heard..

"hold your head high"

"Don't ever let 'em define the light in your eyes"

"Love yourself, Give 'em hell"

"you can take on this world"

"just stand and be strong"

"then fight like a girl"

"Fight like a girl" by Bomshel

These two people mean so much to me. My brother and I have gotten closer in the past few years and even closer these past few months. When I call him scared that I think he's been in an accident, he thinks I'm crazy and tells me not to worry. I love him!

Amber is good for him. He has liked her for a really long time but just know getting to the point that they are "dating."

Anyways, I'm just rambling!

I have so much that I wanna say just don't know how to put it down.

so.. Until next time!

Keep looking up!

Life in pictures...

We have been super busy around here.. Here are some pictures of what we've been up to....

Someone turned 73!

I took cake to his afternoon class

Someone turned 40!

Lance and Amber Prom 2009
Papaw gave Lance the Mustang for the night..What a beautiful couple!Me and my bubby!
Senior Guys And I even got to hold Ciara this week! Such a cutie!
Thats all for now have a good week!

Calling on my pray warriors..

Tomorrow morning, please say a pray for my grandma(mom's side). She's having a heart cath. and like always I worry. Her surgery is at 7am. So, please pray for the doctors and nurses that will be taking care of her. She's in Florida so I wouldn't get to be with her. I know God is in control and He won't give me anything I can't handle.

Just what I need..

"Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe." ~Gail Devers

My last post was all but glamorous. I promised this would be a positive post! I got to thinking about a "new" friend. I realized that God put her in my life for a reason. He knew I needed her in my life even if I didn't know why. She goes out of her way to make my day/night better. I know some of her struggles and she knows mine. For example, after she read my last post she text me and let me know that she was here for me! Wow! Words can't explain how much that meant to me! She didn't text me because she felt like she had to, but only out of the kindness of her heart. She's also going on the Haiti mission trip with me! Which is so exciting! So, I know this special friend will read this post and I just want to tell you that you're an amazing person and you have blessed me! Thank you for everything!

Here are some random of topics of interest this week:
Everyone should watch; Dancing with the Stars, Why? Because Melissa(from the bachelor) is on there and she's amazing!! lol Comes on Monday nights, and tuesday night is when people get kicked off.

Last Thursday night I met the Governor of Indiana Mitch Daniels. Haha His only words to me were... "you look good in green"... maybe cause I had a My man Mitch green shirt on?!?! hmm He shoke my hand and that was about it..


I got to see baby Ciara again last Friday, Shes almost two weeks old: Look at those cubby checks! I recieved this picture while sitting in class! :( But when I got there to hold her she was awake! Kinda! lol

This is from Gage's Gym Rats Tourney! They won! He did such a great job I'm proud of him and his team! :)

I had a good weekend, and it was just what I needed! Saturday night it was girl's night out! We ate at Mi Pueblo and then came back to my house and looked at old pictures and played euchre! It was great to catch up.
Hope everyone is having a good week! Remember to keep your head up!

Love always~

Alone?

Today was my first day at preschool, since Ethan has been back. When I got there he was in my room sleeping like an angel. :) I just wanted to go over to him and snuggle with him. When we woke up, Ethan wanted me to read to him. We read... Puppy goes to school?.. i think that's what it's called. As I was reading my mind drifted to his mom. Wondering what she's thinking about up there? Is she sad or happy...
I wasn't even going to write on here tonight. This is something that I just wanted to keep to myself but it's hard. I was reading a follow bloggers page and it said to talk to someone even if it's a computer. So that's what I'm doing. When Ethan's dad came to pick him up today my heart was crushed into tiny pieces of glass. You could see in his eyes all the pain and hurt he was still having to deal with, while being strong for his little boy. (Ethan looks so much like his mom) Good thing I had sunglasses on because my eyes were full of tears. I left preschool around 5 and headed to the Y. I seem to do my best thinking there.
..........I don't know how to explain how I feel. I only wanted to call one person this afternoon. But I knew that this person and I haven't been the same over the last few months. Our lives have changed dramatically. I knew she would be able to help and just "listen" to me. I knew she is the only person that would "get me." Yes, I have other friends but I just wanted this ONE. I know she's struggling with her own battles, but at that selfish moment, I needed her. Yet, I couldn't bring myself to call. I wouldn't even know where to start a conversation.
Then I got to thinking about my other friends. I don't ever really see them or talk to them? I feel so alone sometimes and I guess today is just one of those days when I wanted a friend to talk to and didn't have anyone. I think this is another reason my relationship with God has blossomed over the past few months and in that sense I'm not complaining.
OK ok enough of this depressing stuff... I PROMISE my next post will be a happy one. I have pictures of Gage's Gym Rats weekend.
My song of the week: The Climb by Miley Cyrus, the lyrics are amazing! here are some that struck me the most.
The struggles I'm facin'
The chances I'm takin'
Sometimes the knock me down but
No I'm not breakin'
I may not know it
But these are the moments that I'm gonna remember most
Just gotta keep goin'
And I gotta be STRONG
Just keep pushing on
Cause there's always gonna be another mountain..

I've added the song to my play list if you wanna hear all of it.
Have a good rest of the week!
Continue to pray for the Boes family, they still have a lot of healing to do!
Love ya all! Goodnight

She's Finally HERE!!

Ciara is finally here! Sorry I don't know how to turn the picture :( But she's beautiful! She arrived Wednesday afternoon and weighed 7lbs! I went to held her last night, so tiny! When we were on our way home I already wanted to go back and hold her! I love her and her family so much! I'm glad everything went smoothly!

I've had an up and down roller coaster of a week. It all started I think Sunday evening, I was working and I was told that Andrea Boes, was in her final days. I was trying to keep professional and not cry but I was fighting back the tears. If you don't already know her little boy Ethan is in Cardinal Care in which I work. I have grown to love him dearly. Monday came and it was my first day back to school after spring back. It was no fun. My body just wanted to be laying in bed! Tuesday, came and I went to school only one class WO WO! Then I went to mom's work to take pictures of Ciara before she arrived! (belly shots) I was working on a "project" for them. It turned out very cute. Ciara was coming early and I knew her mommy was nervous and scared. Tuesday night, Janell and Sarah were home for spring break so we had a girls night! We went to Bobes and then to Lyss's to play Rockband and Wii. I'm not any good. Then I got the news...

Andrea had gone to be with Jesus. Right at that moment my life froze. I'm the kind of person that doesn't like to cry in front of my friends. Sometimes it happens but I just don't want them to see me at my lowest. So, I went out to my car(sorry girls i left) and put my head down and just let the tears come. I prayed to comfort for that family, even Ethan. I continuously prayed! Probably about five to ten minutes later I went back in and tried to continue my night that I was having. I felt bad and every way. I didn't want to be the party pooper. But my mind was elsewhere.

Wednesday came, I knew Ciara was coming around 1:15. I felt like I was talking to God ALL DAY! poor guy! lol.. I wanted everything to be okay with Ciara and her family! I just didn't think I could handle another sadness.God was listening Ciara was perfect and mommy is doing awesome!

Friday, the day went pretty well, until I came home from work/cc. Friday was the viewing for andrea and on the way home, I had want I call an "emotional breakdown." To be honest, I was at the point, thinking I need one reason not to be angry with God right now. Of course I didn't want to think that, I was upset. When I calmed down I remembered that God gives and He takes away! Andrea is living in Heaven and Ethan will get to see her again one day! I think my thoughts were how can you take a 4 yr old away from his mom? But I have to remember God has "Bigger plans" as I was reading some other blogs I came across something Andrea had said and it's so true. Always Look at Each Day as it Being the GREATEST Day to be Here!" Andrea Boes 01/09. It's amazing how many lives she has touched! Though I have only met her a few times picking Ethan and one time at FatBoys, I have been truly blessed to know of her. I'm glad she's is no longer suffering.

Today, I watched the funeral procession leave from the church and I just wanted to take all the pain away from those families! But I realize the God is great no matter what!

Last night, as I held Ciara I realized that this is just another one of God's miracles! I do have so many blessings! I don't mean to complain and I don't want to sound like I'm the only one that has "emotional breakdowns." I know there are others! So today I'm going to try and be positive and thank God for everything I have been blessed with!

So, that's what I call a rollcoaster of a week. I had highs and lows, but in the end I believe I have grown closer to Him.

God bless you and your families, and have a safe weekend!

Keep Looking up!

Discouraged..

Wow I'm totally awful about keeping up to date! Many things have happened since Feb. 24! The season finale of the BACHELOR! Like the millions of others that watch this, I was totally upset! grr.. STUPID GUY! I'm ready for next season... This is why I brought up this topic for my girls.. I read in the new People magazine last night, If you didn't already know Melissa is now on Dancing with the Stars, I watched it the first night and she had only 48 hours to learn while others had weeks. Let me tell you she did AMAZING! She got one of the top scores! So I was cheesy and called and voted for her! Anyways, back to the magazine, at the end of the little interview she said, I don't care if Jason or Molly watch. I don't need there vote!! She's right she doesn't. She got a standing ovation before she even made a dance move! How cool!.. Ok enough on that I'm addicted...
Last weekend was my girls weekend in Huntsville, AL. We had a blast. We stayed at the Embassy Suites. The first night, Friday, my Aunt got the bellhop to give us free pop, popcorn, and a FREE movie! The movie was $13 and we got it free! We went to three different malls! At our first stop (DSW) we walked out the door with 9 pairs of shoes! The rest of the day I picked up little things here and there! All in all it was great to enjoy time with my family!
This week I've been on Spring Break. I fill like I haven't even had a break. Monday I just unpacked my suitcase, watched Y & R, went to the Y, and that's about it. Tuesday I went to Bloomington to see two of my besties! We ate at steak and shake, walked on campus, and went back to the apartment and burnt cookies and cinnamon rolls! We even set the fire alarm off! OPPS!
The rest of the week is a blurr... Thursday I went to a Lia Sophia party. Wednesday and Friday I worked at the Preschool and tonight and tomorrow I work at Redbones! Today we're having the Borden Boys Basketball team in to eat. We were told to treat them well because they may get to play North Daviess tonight! lol And Borden has probably never had so many Viking Fans!

Now, on a serious note! Do you often get discouraged? Feel selfish? Most of you know I'm heading to Haiti in a few months. Well, I sent out 30 some support letters almost a month ago. I really didn't even want to send them out because I felt selfish! I didn't want to ask people for money that's just not me. So, there were two options of my letter. 1. Pray for me and my team and 2. Pray and support financially. I didn't want people to think they had to give in the gift of money!!. We need just as much pray! Anyways, I became discouraged after 3 weeks of having letters out, I had only received 5! I talked to my mom and grandma about it on our way to Huntsville, saying I don't expect people to give, I just want to know that they are behind me in the things I'm doing! I want to know I have people that will be praying for us. I would ask God is this a sign? I'm a not suppose to go? The only word that I could come up with was DISCOURAGED! I knew in my heart that I needed to take this journey! I feel I have God's support! But I wanted my family's support also! I tried not to worry about it over the "girls weekend" and I didn't. Sunday night when we got home, I hadn't received any letters over the weekend! My heart just sunk and became discouraged once again. I told myself that God was in control, and He knows my heart. Monday when we received the mail. I couldn't believe it! I had received 4 letters!! 4 Letters!! When I opened the first letter, I began to cry! The check was written for a generous amount! I was speechless. I felt like God was telling me I needed to just have patience! He will provide for me!
Way to often do we become discouraged quickly. I know I do!
So, I'm working on that!
Enjoy your weekend!
Keep looking up!

Love is not a fight

Love is not a place

To come and go as we please

It's a house we enter in

And then commit to never leave

Lock the door behind you

Throw away the key

We'll work it out together

Let it bring us to our knees

Love is a shelter in the raging storm

Love is peace in the middle of a war

If we try to leave, may God send His angels to guard the door

No, love is not a fight but it's something worth fighting for

To some, love is a word
That they can fall into

But when they're falling out

Keeping that word is hard to do

Love will come to save us
If we'll only call

He will ask nothing from us

But demand we give our all

I will fight for you

Would you fight for me?

It's worth fighting for

Today, I'm praying for all those who are struggling in their marriages and those who just want to give up! I also pray for those whose hearts that have been broken, may God give them renewed strength to begin their new life. I love this song and to me it means that when you make a commitment let nothing tear you apart. I also see how much God gives and gives. He loves and loves unconditionally! Does it break your heart when you see people whose heart doesn't belong to God? I want to see them in Heaven one day! I know God has given me renewed strength to spread His word. I'm super excited about my trip to Haiti. I have truly felt that this trip will change my life! I'm so ready to jump in to whatever He has planned for me. Over this past year God has been working in me! I'm sick of my "lukewarm" living!! I'm sick of always worrying. I need to fully rely on God!

I'm going to try and post some pictures from this weekend!

We celebrated Britt's birthday on Friday night, with a trip to Bobes, and Cake and ice cream @ her house! :)

Happy 20th Birthday Brittany!!

I don't know where to begin. My heart has been in so many places this week. I've been in my room for hours trying to catch up on a weeks worth of homework,tests, and quizzes that I missed last week. I couldn't concentrate. My mind was off daydreaming. I started thinking about our trip to Haiti this summer and the team that we're going with. I'm excited! My next subject of thought was the BACHELOR!!! I'm totally addicted to this show and so are some my girls!! Ok, so I've been thinking about this show all day looonnggg!! It was so good last night and we have to wait two WHOLE weeks before we will know who wins! Of course, we all want Melissa to win! ;) I know it's stupid but this show is a MUST and it's driving me crazy that I don't know who the winner is!!
Today, is also Brittany's 20th birthday! Today is probably the toughest birthday for her and all I want to do is wrap my arms around her and never let her go! I know her daddy is smiling down at her, proud of everything she has and will accomplish. Sometimes I just don't know what to say. My heart hurts because I know they still struggle each and every day. Some days I think to myself why am I crying? I never in a million years thought I would be this emotional. So this is what I have to say to my best friend and cousin you could ask for! You are the strongest person I've ever met. Each day you bless so many people. I pray that today God gives you strength to go about your day and enjoy this birthday I'm sure it's one you'll never forget! You know that my only regret about coming home this year is that I can't be by your side when you need someone, but I do pray and think about you ALL the time. I know we haven't been as close these past couple of months but I do know it's hard and hopefully you always remember that I'm not going anywhere! :) Love you always! :)
New subject :) I made plans to go to Huntsville, AL in a couple of weeks to visit my aunt who is driving up from Mississippi and were gonna meet half way. We are going to have a girls weekend and do some "retail therapy." Yep, you heard me I'm going to shop, shop, and shop some more! :) I can't wait!
Well I'm gonna go for now but I'll try and get better at updating!
Love you all,
Keep looking up! :)

With all my heart...

Wow.. I'm so behind. I've been tagged in two blog addictions and I haven't even had time to do either one of them. O well I'm sure I'll get around to them at one point!
Here's what's on my mind lately and I finally can share it with you! For the past few months I've been considering taking a leap of faith and doing something that I've never done. With many prayers and getting it cleared with my doctor(skin dr), I'm heading to Haiti in June for some mission work. I've always wanted to do something like this but never knew if I "could" do it. I'm so use to my lifestyle and my daily routine. After all that has happened throughout last year, I came to realize that I'm truly blessed. God gives me everything I'll ever need, so why not go a help those in need? I'm going with some girls that have truly inspired me and with help from God, I've signed up and paid my first deposit. No turning back now, and I don't want to. Last night me and Steph talking about how God influenced us in our decisions. She was saying how in church that day they were talking about a verse(Isaiah 6:8) and she knew it was meant for her to hear. I shared that in our church that morning we sang "I will SERVE you Lord with all my heart, with all my soul, with all my mind, and all my STRENGTH." I felt like He was telling me it's time to do things for others, step out of my comfort zone and share His love with others. So, I will serve Him with all of my heart! I'm totally amazed at the way God works in my life as well as my friends'. He has truly blessed me with these friends that are going to take this journey with me! God Bless them! If I may ask for one thing, please pray for us! We are going to need many prayers in order for this trip to work out! We are going with New Hope Christian Church in Washington!
I have some birthday wishes I want to mention.. Happy Birthday Garrett R. Jan 27, Aunt Jackie Jan 31, Parker Feb 1(whose 7, can you believe that) Brittany D. Feb 3 and TODAY is Steph's 20th Birthday and I have a surprise for her tonight at Bachelor Night! :) WO WO! We're totally addicted to that show!
Anyways, not much else has changed. I enjoyed not having to come to school a couple days last week. I did go to Evansville on Tuesday for a Dr. appt.(not the smartest idea) and made it home safely.
Well I hope everyone has a wonderful week!
Keep looking up and God Bless! :)

Accusations and Comfort

It's been a long time since I wrote. I guess it's time. I don't really know how to start this blog. I've struggled this week with accusations that were placed on my family. I couldn't believe there are actual people out there that think they know my family better than I do. I was upset and furious. I felt I had the right to be. These people made me question my own trust for a certain family member that I've never doubted in my whole life. They got me questioning myself and my beliefs. I didn't know where these accusations were coming from or what they knew that I didn't. I was so angry along with a few other people. When I first heard this accusation all I could think was "God if this accusation is true, then please show me, give me a sign." "I don't want to be blind to this situation."
Sunday came.. WAKE UP CALL! I went to church and Keith Meece was preaching. I enjoy listening to him. His sermon was about strength. Strength to forgive. Not holding grudges, and confronting people in a Christian-like way and forgive for their faults. He would say you can tell someone to forgive, forgive, forgive, yet you yourself doesn't forgive. How can you want someone to do something that you can not yourself do? I was hurt and broken that Sunday and as he preached it was like he was looking right at me and my family. I knew God was telling me I needed to let it go. Yes the accusation hurt BUT God knows the truth. God wants us to live for Him everyday! I have forgiven these people and I pray that God becomes more prevalent in their lives....... Enough on that subject..
Here are some things I can catch you up on. I caught up with a friend last Friday night. We had dinner at Applebees and went to see Bride Wars, which was good. I enjoyed her company. We use to have our "date nights" all the time but I went away to school and we just got busy with life. She's a good friend that I know I can always count on!
I started school yesterday! YUCK! I left my house around 7:15 am and I got home around 8 pm. I was a long day. So today I only had one class and it didn't start till 930 so I got to sleep in a little bit longer than Monday! Tonight I worked for a little bit and then decided I was bored so I shut down early. :)
WO WO ..to all my bachelor addicts(my friends) wasn't last nights show awesome! :) random I know..
I want to wish Jim a happy birthday! I know he's not physically here but it's on my mind today! My dad went out to his grave today because Jamie had told him that she put some chimes on his grave. I bet they sound beautiful. :) Continue to pray for their family! I know we all miss him dearly!
I need to head to bed I have another busy day tomorrow with school, work, and the Y.
Hope everyone is enjoying their week.
God Bless!